Help! I can’t fix things.
How do I cope with what’s on my plate?
The therapist says, “Remember, words matter.”
Apathy, lies and challenges too tough to swallow make us hunger for just a sliver of solution to crack and break through dysfunction. Things have gotten so bad that one finally asks a counselor for help; another, lacking enthusiasm, tags along with a belligerent disposition. The counselor’s goal isn’t to provide coping skills so to fester in a harmful environment; she wants to train her patients to utilize good manners and work together toward mutual kindness. By emphasizing the value of improving communication, she hopes to make a safe place to grow and repair damage. Her reasonableness sounds so good to only one patient.
With all the wishful thinking in the world, often there’s no human fix to stop all hurting between people. When issues are exposed, sometimes, things get dangerously worse. Good intentions are twisted and rejected. Continual misplaced blame piles up until it outweighs the more innocent’s survival mode. Capability to carry on is crushed by the
weight of it all. One can be caught in the middle of two opposing parties. The scope is wide on topics that strain relationships and bring on sadness.
- one’s own error and fault may be quickly recognized, confessed and corrected; or may rarely or never be admitted
- apologies may be immediately forgiven and dropped; or forgiveness is denied and the subject will be remembered for later use as ammunition
- one desires professional advice for physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual health improvement; yet to the irresponsible, help is unwelcome and won’t penetrate sin-plugged ears
- misunderstandings—one is eager to discuss and learn; yet the contrary declares evidence inadmissible
- interactions range from hospitable to hostile
- levels of maturity have less to do with age than to do with selfish ambition or conceit in contrast to empathy and compassion for one another
Joyful benefits of goodwill and favorable virtues such as humility, encouragement, comfort, affection and sympathy are lost by failure to make an effort to
- repent of resentment and bitterness
- consider others’ needs more important and urgent than my own
- confess that I, individually need help, without pointing at another
- get help for myself so that I can enjoy healthy, thriving relationships with others
When we aren’t walking by the Spirit in an attitude of fear, love, and trust in God who empowers and motivates us and is greater than anything in the world, then we fall to temptations (sin). Greedy, corrupted minds say
- there’s no personal problem I have that can’t be blamed on something or someone else, even on God
- there’s no reason to change since my [worst] character traits serve me well
- leave me alone and let your problem fade away
- I can use whatever [spiteful harsh, hollow] words I want
- you should be like __ (fill in name of another person)
- I’m smarter, bigger, and have more power than you, so I can
- cut you down or cut you off
- insist you think exactly like me
- manipulate you to do what I want whenever I want
- cut you down or cut you off
Broken trust is real, whether it be
- a person stops trusting that God loves them
- a person stops trusting that another person loves them
Advice such as let sleeping dogs lie or don’t poke the bear remind us how vital it is to remember that when you’re in unhealthy dangerous situations, God’s Words of love matter more than the silence of estrangement or noisy, senseless raging words that ring in ears and damage souls. The Author and Perfecter of Faith hasn’t promised to remove every difficulty or problem of this world; yet He does promise to help us through these experiences. Thankful for our Creator’s good will, in Jesus Name we may pray for
- people who persecute us
- ability to recognize lies and stand firm in truth
- protection from harm and deliverance from temptations which flow from being bitten
- a repentant heart with clarity of own failures
- desire to listen to God’s responses to prayers: you’re forgiven, yes, no, or not yet
- faith to receive God’s grace even when people refuse to offer grace
- motivation to be kind when others are cruel
- healing
- peace and confidence, acknowledging God is in control
As they passed by in the morning, they saw the fig tree withered away to its roots. And Peter remembered and said to him, “Rabbi, look! The fig tree that you cursed has withered.” And Jesus answered them, “Have faith in God. Truly, I say to you, whoever says to this mountain, ‘Be taken up and thrown into the sea,’ and does not doubt in his heart, but believes that what he says will come to pass, it will be done for him. Therefore I tell you, whatever you ask in prayer, believe that you have received it, and it will be yours. And whenever you stand praying, forgive, if you have anything against anyone, so that your Father also who is in heaven may forgive you your trespasses.”—Mark 11:20-25
…And what I say to you I say to all: Stay awake.”
—Mark 13:37 (watch/listen/read more)
Mark 4:21-22
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| And he said to them, “Is a lamp brought in to be put under a basket, or under a bed, and not on a stand? For nothing is hidden except to be made manifest; nor is anything secret except to come to light. Mark 4:21-22 |
Transparency is key to unlock closed doors and move toward light.
Hiding is useless. No thought, word or deed can be hidden from God. Honesty is the best policy. All of us can pray to resist temptations to
- hide behind closed-minded stubborn lies such as: I don’t have to listen to anyone, or consider anyone’s feelings, or change my ways—I’ve read books on this, or experienced enough to know—I’m right and you’re wrong, period.
- be dishonestly blind to the reality of how own actions affect other people
- cut off healthy communication
- think too highly of oneself without looking in the mirror of Truth
- refuse to forgive, apologize, empathize, and show compassion
- harbor a vengeful attitude
- put the worst construction on situations
- doubt Savior Jesus removes sin
- deny the power of the Holy Spirit changes people
Behind the fog of human passion, desire, pride, arrogance and mask of self-isolation, immaturity takes risky directions from the principalities of evil which surround and tempt us to spin on slippery surfaces and slide into the ditch. Power-trips, provoking others and wasting precious time puts oneself and innocent people at risk. Without restoration by the Word to return to the new way of life, truth, and Christlike love, we can get lost, crash, burn and end up eternally dead.
Jesus defends us from the fear of our enemies and provides everything needed for life now until eternity.
Thank our Heavenly Father for His perfect planning around our mistakes and hard times. He utilizes everything for His good purposes, entrusting those who love Him with influential means for growth toward His Son. Because we can only see dimly in this world and have no super-power to fix things, we permit the Spirit of Truth to lead and encourage faith. God is Almighty and we are not. In His cross He carried the full weight of every sin—thought, word, and deed—of all people, past, present and future. He nudges, fills us with His breath of life which draws us to take refuge by bringing our heavy concerns to Him and praying others would do the same. In our weakness, the Spirit of Truth helps us pray and intercedes for us with groanings too deep for words. Jesus serves everyone, including those with whom He disagrees and exclaims from the cross, “Father, forgive them; they do not know what they are doing.” Have you ever wondered what to do or why is this happening? Our freedom is in reliance on The Only Way to be guided on our journey to the safe place He provides. Christ’s humiliation and exaltation creates plenty of space for us to receive His benefits of redemption, mercy, deliverance, restoration and healing. We praise and adore Him for this work!
By the Holy Spirit’s power, we’re drawn outside of ourselves and given certain hope.
We honor the One who has no limitations when we acknowledge our own and trust that He cares. The Bible reveals that by our own reason or strength, it’s impossible to do what’s needed to save ourselves from the power of evil. The Spirit of Life gives faith to repent and trust Jesus who already defeated sin, death and evil. God’s Word corrects false notions that individually on our own, a counselor, parent, child, friend, teacher—any person we know—science, or government could solve problems for us. Believing what’s served to us in bread and wine, we receive absolute forgiveness as well as strength to trust Christ has done for us—what we are unable to do for ourselves and for others. Jesus knows our afflictions. We may cling to righteousness won for us at His cross of crucifixion. Believers who are forgiven
and healed by the power of His passion and resurrection, will also be bodily resurrected on the Last
Day! Empowered in our weakness and equipped with grace sufficient for each day, we share His purpose by showing mercy to others, even those with whom we disagree. Grasping grace, walking in the Spirit of Truth, we effectively transfer trustworthy wisdom revealed in God’s Word for us and all people.
The same Word gets different reactions from various people.
The Holy Spirit, received by the faith given in Baptism with the Gospel, can be handled two ways:
- Believe and take to heart the work of the Holy Spirit—the body of believers of the One True God pray according to His will, regularly receive His gifts, praise Him, take refuge and share the Good News of the grace of God who will save them on the Last Day.
- Not wanting help, ignore and refuse the work of the Holy Spirit—join unbelievers who become their own god or invent their own gods. Cannot please or be heard by the One True God. Will be welcomed by Satan in hell on the Last Day.
For whoever is ashamed of me and of my words in this adulterous and sinful generation, of him will the Son of Man also be ashamed when he comes in the glory of his Father with the holy angels.” Mark 8:38
Without the light of Christ people are walking in darkness. Imagine the feeling of being alone in a cold, dark, scary cave. There’s a Psalm to pray for this situation.
With my voice I cry out to the Lord; with my voice I plead for mercy to the Lord. I pour out my complaint before him; I tell my trouble before him. When my spirit faints within me, you know my way! In the path where I walk they have hidden a trap for me. Look to the right and see: there is none who takes notice of me; no refuge remains to me; no one cares for my soul. I cry to you, O Lord; I say, “You are my refuge, my portion in the land of the living.” Attend to my cry, for I am brought very low! Deliver me from my persecutors, for they are too strong for me! Bring me out of prison, that I may give thanks to your name! The righteous will surround me, for you will deal bountifully with me. Psalm 142How bright and wonderful is humble transparency mingling with the Light-of-the-World’s atoning perfection! We need salvation no matter how old we are, so we prayerfully bring babies to the baptismal font to be given faith. Then, by grace, we raise them up to be shaped by God in His Word for their spiritual well-being. The Lord, faithful to His promises, gave His life as a ransom for all people.
But when Jesus saw it, he was indignant and said to them, “Let the children come to me; do not hinder them, for to such belongs the kingdom of God. Mark 10:14
A child isn’t born innocent. We are all under the power of the devil, lost, until Christ claims us as His own when we are reborn and named as God’s own child.
“Conceived and born in sin” is the way the Scriptures put it (Ps. 51:5). Every human is born spiritually blind, dead and an enemy of God (see 1 Cor. 2:14; Eph. 2:1; Rom. 5:10). The theological term is “original sin.” What is Sin? by Rev. Herbert C. Mueller
The very first thing every infant in this world learns is their need for help. All they do is receive, like our dependence to receive gifts from God who provides daily bread, faith, forgiveness (to be no longer held accountable for sin, making us forgivers of others), rescue from temptation, freedom from guilt of being entangled with consequences of sin. We need help from other Christians. [explore how guilt and forgiveness affect a person’s health]
It is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for a rich person to enter the kingdom of God.” And they were exceedingly astonished, and said to him, “Then who can be saved?” Mark 10:25-26
Mark 10:27
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| Jesus looked at them and said, “With man it is impossible, but not with God. For all things are possible with God.” Mark 10:27 |
God is full of love for people who don’t deserve it.
God’s sacrifice saves people who are undeserving to enter the kingdom of God. Only by the merit of Jesus, anything is possible. Doing good things for everyone, especially those in the body of Christ, and making good decisions is great, yet it isn’t what qualifies us for faith or a spot in heaven. The Counselor, working through The Church, helps us hear, believe and receive Christ’s redeeming work. Jesus willingly took punishment we deserve and finished what was planned before creation—the ultimate solution at the cross of crucifixion for mankind’s salvation—His perfect shed blood and sovereign risen body. So much better than just a sliver or a full slice of pie—beyond anything of our making or served on our plate—our Heavenly Father sees contrite sinners through the lens of His Holy Son who
- knows sorrows
- cancels debts
- richly forgives
- calms the storms of life
- strengthens faith to resist growing weary
- gives wisdom to live in the Word
- blesses with gifts of righteousness, grace, mercy, patience, integrity, comfort, refuge…heaven
- shines light, joy and peace through each person who receives and loves Christ [learn more]
- is love, joy, peace, patience, kind, good, faithful, gentle
“The time is fulfilled,” He said, “and the kingdom of God is near. Repent and believe in the gospel!” —Jesus (Mark 1:15)
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